Friday, October 10, 2014

Here we go again........

Yes almost a year later, I am back again. Desperately needing to vent.
Maybe desperate is a strong word, but might be right word. One gotta admit ones true emotions and if  your are feeling down, there is nothing wrong in admitting it and try to work thru it.
I have lots to celebrate and be thankful for.
I am expecting my second baby... miracle/surprise baby. God blessed me at the right moment and made sure I did not have to struggle this time around. I am so grateful for that.On top of it God has granted me "my wish" something I always desired and hoped I get.
So I am the luckiest woman in that sense. My little boy is doing great and keeps me entertained.
Now I just need to turn around our finances.  Its case of more demand and less supply and we are making it now, but things could get bit harder with me going on maternity leave in couple of months.
And it worries me.
And on top of it Thorn concerns and chats are back and no matter how hard I try to put it out of my mind, it bugs me. I am going to let it be and not bother myself about something I have no control over. Family peace is more important to me than anything....
Gotta go for now

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Kinda down:( need self pep talk

So kinda down at the moment.... financial woes...picture not to rosy at the moment and as always I know I be in the state of mind for only little bit.
Positive outlook about things and life in general has never shaken, but still we all get caught in the moment sometimes. The moment which worries you.
I know we always bounce back and of course is future is bright as ever and I am very lucky and blessed with so much.
This phase is already over and I am moving forward, but if I do need to pen it down just for my sanity to get it out of system, then here it is.
I am anxious about the state of my check book at the moment. Not under water but quite bleak I must say. It does make me a little nervous, but I know it is passing, as always better times are here and will keep coming.
Most important thing is I am very happy with my life. I have my little boy who is brightest spot in my life worth every penny in the world.
I do feel sometimes, some members of my family could have handled things differently, but again I am hoping its a gamble that pays off in the end.
Of course its always dark before the sun's rays hit out.... so my Sun is rising and coming to me fast.i
I just need to stay strong and positive.

Thursday, November 14, 2013


Count your blessings everyday

If you want more good things, good experiences and happy memories, count your blessings daily.

We all have lots to be thankful to God for, I know I am for many great things in my life.

I am truly thankful for the biggest blessing of my life, my children. Being a mother has completed me, I feel like I have accomplished the biggest goal of my life. I knew I be a mother, I had visualized it and now the picture is complete.

I am grateful for health of my family and loved one. I am grateful to have most wonderful husband who is my best friend and lover. I am thankful to get loving and understanding in-laws, happy siblings and most wonderful cousins.

I am truly thankful and grateful for all the success in each field we ventured into, whether it be business or professional work.

I truly enjoy my doing few hours of work.

I am thankful for financial independence, ability to go anywhere I want, buy anything I want and enjoy life to the fullest.

I am most positive person in the world, and things always work out for me. I am very happy, calm and content.




To do

Oh now that my mind is free of unnecessary clutter, I must take out the physical clutter in the house.

Too much to do, I should visualize it accomplished already. That is the key to get it done and done faster.

Organize the filing system, drawers, cabinets and closets, massive amount of work, consider it done.

I am going to narrow it down to one task at a time and get it done.

I intend to continue the health routines I have started, seeing results already. Super happy about that. Weight is coming off faster, old scars, blemishes (not that there were many) are fading or gone. Hair growing thicker and fuller and I see myself smiling a lot more.



Yes I know it’s the New Year’s yet and anyhow I don’t believe in that anyways. One should be able to make resolutions any time of the year.

When one’s mind get cluttered with so much mumbo jumbo, when one gets too caught up in unnecessary dramas, trash needs to be throw out.

Mind is not a place to store negative thoughts, grudges or bad memories. Better clear it now then to get too overwhelmed that you don’t even know where to begin.

Past year and have had been glorious, actually make it 2 years but last 6 months so much has happened that has taken toll on my mind. As a positive person I can’t live with this state of mind.

I need to go down the list and take out all the unnecessary thoughts, feelings and what not. Time has come to do much needed self therapy.

First off I would like to accept once and for all the relationship or the status of relationship I have with certain elders in the family.  Of course maybe I could have handled situations differently, but I truly don’t think it would have made much difference to outcome. Somehow they would have found a reason to be offended and I can only control actions of myself, not what my sibling does. In the end he would have still offended him by not meeting their standards of politeness and I would have been in negative light any ways.

Ones who choose not to come and expected special call, well I have no regrets about it. Cause in the hindsight, it did not cross my mind and nor did I had time to make the calls anyways. That relationship was never perfect to begin with and again no amount of pleasing would worked. Washing my hands off and moving on.

Relations on in-laws side: seems ok with all, few who might felt offended by my personality not much I can do about. I don’t show fake concern and my true feelings show on my face and nothing I can do about that.

Sore thorn, harsh word being used here, let me use it the nicest possible way, mention of it did cause bit of heartburn, then again, things always work out for me, and so I am not going to pay much attention to it. Everyone involved is pretty mature and I am sure they will use their best judgment if the issue arises.

Parenting and interference, again I am going to be wise, patient and pick the battle worth fighting for. Petty issues and interferences, I am going to ignore. In one ear, out the other, that policy has worked so well in the past and I will continue adopting it.

Friendly woes, I have non and drama others are embroiled in, staying out of it. Going to concentrate on my life and my close loved ones as always. What others do, gain or lose is none of my business. It does not affect me in any sense. I have my own life to live, my own story and it’s not going to be influenced by anyone else. Grass is never greener on other side and I would never want to switch my life with anyone. What’s mine will come to me, I just have visualize and receive it. Of course on that note, no more search on issues unrelated to these individuals or situations. My time is way too precious to be wasted on it.



Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Need to Blog

Oh I am back,,,,,, need to vent badly... put things in perspective....when life gets hectic again.
gotta step back and breathe.
So unable to log onto my old blog:
Hence created a new one...what is goin on in life
Accomplised the biggest goal of my life.. mother to little one.. past year and half has been
super hectic. Feel so blessed all the time... few things irritating at the moment.. that is why I need to get it out and start afresh.
AHHHHHHHHHHHH breathe. Life is so beautiful now.. since I got my little angel in it:)